Quote of the week

My quote of the week is from 50 Cent talking about how much money he has.

"Have a baby by me baby, be a millionare, I'll write the check before the baby comes, who the f*#k cares"

That is one of the funniest things I have ever heard in my life. If you can't laugh at that then you have no sense of humor.

I Hate Snuggies!

Snuggies go by many names. The Slanket, the Freedom blanket, and of course the Snuggie. I hate them all. If you have a snuggie don't take this the wrong way but you kind of suck. If you don't have a snuggie but you want one, you too kind of suck. Children are excluded because they are not smart enough to know better.

I could make this into a conversation about the consumer society that we live in where you can create a totally useless product and people spend their hard earned recession money to get it. But I'd rather point out that people are idiots.

A snuggie is a backwards robe without the belt. You can try to argue that its not, but I went to college and I know what the hell a robe is, and I can tell when someone is wearing it backwards. And how lazy are you that you can't take your arm out of a blanket for the 15 seconds it takes to use the remote or take a sip of whatever your drink of choice is (probably wine). You suck for being that lazy. You don't want your arms to get cold? Then put on a sweatshirt or some other shirt with long sleeves. Buying a snuggie is a colossal waste of money.

I am amazed that seemingly intelligent people can want such a worthless product. I do have a solution though. Anyone who wants a snuggie, call me and I will buy it for you, but you must let me punch you in the face first. After I punch you in the face, you still won't get the snuggie. I'm sorry but I'm a fother mucker.

Douchebag of the Week

My Douche bag of the week is Glenn Beck. What the hell was he crying about on a semi-legitimate news show. There is a such thing as overreacting. The world still spins and the sun still shines. Hey Glenn Beck, stop being a douche bag!

OJ and Roman Polanski

Why is America so fascinated with OJ Simpson? People form an opinion about you based on whether or not you think OJ did it. What if you don't give damn (insert the F word or S word for more dramatic effect)? I personally don't really care all that much. 14 years ago when OJ killed those people. . . . I mean 14 years ago when the OJ trial was happening, I remember being a teenager and happy that he got off. But that was only because he was the only black person I ever saw in court not go to jail. Is that so wrong?

When I grew up a little bit I learned that famous people generally don't go to jail because the have money and fans. But after Marion Jones and Michael Vick went to jail I had to reassess that view (Watch your back Barry, they are coming for your steroid enhanced ass next). They both had excess money and fans and ended up in the pokey. I think this may be backlash from OJ getting off all those years ago. OJ messed up the free ride for famous black athletes in the justice system. Thanks OJ.

I must admit though, I am surprised that there hasn't been more backlash towards other groups of people. like say White movie directors.

Roman Polanski raped a teenager and jumped bail and no one seems to care. Actors in Hollywood today actively say the government should leave Roman Polanski alone and allow him to enter the country again. So he can get to the important task of making movies in a Hollywood studio again (don't invite him over Jack Nicholson, nothing good can happen). I have a sneaking suspicion that if Polanski's movies sucked no one would care if he went to jail. Too bad for OJ he couldn't carry the pigskin anymore when he did his dirt (allegedly).

Woody Allen married his daughter and he gets to make movie after movie with Scarlett Johansen. That ain't right. He sits court side at Knick games with his wife/daughter and people act like he isn't some deviant child molester. I guess its okay if you put a ring on it. When are we going to start holding movie directors accountable. White movie directors need to be held to the same standard as black athletes. I bet John singleton couldn't get away with that BS.

And don't get me started on the Kennedys. . . .

Introduction

This is the begining of The Big Random Blog, where you will get my random thoughts on random topics such as news, sports, and pop culture. You will read my unique opinion on essoteric subjects as well as subjects generally regarded as nerdy. This is where I get to say all the things I would say to my friends if I cared to use a telephone. . . . I don't.

There will be grammatical errors, misspellings, and poor syntax. Learn to love it. Or continue to hate it. I don't really care all that much. Just fair warning.

I know my limited attention span (and full time job as an attorney) will not allow me to blog everyday, and my assumption is that you probably don't care. That's just fine. Not caring is healthy. My wife says you can't trust people that care too much because it means they are probably up to something. I don't know if I agree with her 100%, but what I do know is that people who seem to care a lot are just plain weird. Not the good weird either.

Because I am feeling particularly random today, I will tell you what my next post will be about. My comparison of O.J. Simpson and Roman Polanski.